I had specifically prayed for it NOT to happen. Not just once or twice, but with fervent hope and persistent supplication for weeks on end. Have you ever wondered if prayers are sometimes an opportunity for a higher power to stretch you in exactly the way you’ve tried to avoid? This profound question echoed in my mind as we embarked on what was supposed to be a momentous, yet challenging, weekend.
That particular weekend, occurring last spring, proved to be incredibly rough. For weeks leading up to our departure, my husband Cade and I had poured our hearts out in prayer, asking for one simple thing: that when we left town on Friday to speak at the renowned Time Out For Women conference, our children would remain safe, happy, and above all, HEALTHY with their loving aunt. I can’t quite pinpoint why I felt such a strong, insistent pull to pray so diligently against illness during our absence, but the conviction was undeniable. It was an intense, repeated outpouring of my deepest desires and fears.
Every time the thought of their well-being popped into my head, a silent, earnest prayer was immediately offered, seeking divine assurance that all would indeed be well.
Initially, I tried to rationalize this persistent concern, attributing it to the inherent stress of traveling away from our precious children. It’s always incredibly difficult for us to be apart, even when the purpose is as incredible and impactful as addressing thousands of women at Time Out for Women, sharing messages of light and hope. Yet, deep down, I knew this specific emphasis on health felt different, a premonition I couldn’t shake.
There was absolutely no way we could have guessed just how severely our carefully laid plans, and our fervent prayers, were about to be tested. The universe, it seemed, had a very different lesson in store for us.
Balancing Purpose and Parenthood: Making It All Happen
Our commitment to speaking at events like Time Out For Women is a significant undertaking. The process involves flying to another state, delivering a deeply personal and inspiring 35-40 minute speech to thousands gathered in a vast conference hall, and then connecting with attendees during book signings for our cookbook, Our Sweet Basil Kitchen, among other activities. It’s an experience that is at once utterly exhausting, physically and emotionally, and profoundly wonderful, fulfilling our deepest desire to serve and inspire.
However, pursuing these opportunities invariably means leaving our children behind. As parents who strongly believe in being as present and involved as humanly possible in our children’s lives, taking off for a weekend, sometimes as often as once a month, is incredibly difficult. The challenge is compounded by the fact that we don’t have immediate family living nearby who can consistently help out. This necessitates meticulous arranging and scheduling, a complex logistical dance to ensure everything falls into place, allowing us to pursue what we feel is a higher calling.
To be honest, we wouldn’t undertake this demanding schedule if it weren’t for one compelling reason: we genuinely feel we are meant to. There’s a powerful sense of purpose that drives us.
After each event, we are overwhelmed by a flood of emails and messages from attendees, sharing their personal experiences, their breakthroughs, and how our words have touched their lives. These testimonials reinforce our belief that sometimes, to fulfill our mission to spread light and inspiration throughout the world, we must make significant personal sacrifices. It’s a commitment that transcends convenience, rooted in a desire to contribute positively to the lives of others.
The Unexpected Turn: A Moment of Crisis
Now, let’s return to the heart of our story, the moment our fervent prayers seemed to go unanswered. The day of our departure finally arrived. My sister, a true lifesaver, traveled all the way from Idaho to Utah to watch our beloved children for the weekend, arriving safely and soundly. With our older kids at school, we loaded the car, and she, along with our toddler, drove us to the airport, a scene of calm anticipation.
We pulled up to the curb at the airport, ready to unload our luggage and begin our journey, our minds filled with the anticipation of the conference and the slight ache of leaving our kids.
I turned around in my seat, my heart a little heavy but full of love, to say a final goodbye to our sweet little guy in the backseat. It was in that precise moment, without warning, that our toddler suddenly, violently vomited all over his car seat and the interior of the car. 🤮 🚙
And I don’t mean a small, contained mess. This was projectile vomiting, the kind you only witness in exaggerated horror movies, covering everything in its path.
Are. You. Serious.
A wave of disbelief washed over us. After weeks of specifically praying for health, how, *how* could this possibly be happening? It felt like a cruel irony, a direct contradiction to every prayer we had uttered. 😫
A cascade of anxious questions immediately flooded my mind: Were we not supposed to do this? Was this a clear, unmistakable sign that we should turn back? Had our prayers not been heard at all? The sudden chaos felt like a cosmic joke, a direct challenge to our faith and our convictions.
The ordeal that followed was nothing short of nightmarish. Cleaning the car at the airport, frantic and under immense pressure, felt like battling a monster. We had to throw away clothes because we couldn’t find proper bags, adding to the growing despair. And just when we thought things couldn’t get worse, Cade realized his wallet had fallen out somewhere amidst the chaos, threatening our ability to board the flight. (Thankfully, my sister, ever the miracle worker, miraculously found it later, averting a complete disaster.) Each setback felt like a deliberate slap in the face, compounding our fear and confusion.
We were utterly consumed by fear. How could we possibly leave our children in this state? Why had the exact opposite of our most heartfelt prayers come to pass? The questions were overwhelming, the answers elusive.
Embracing Faith Overwhelming Fear
But amidst the spiraling fear and doubt, a quiet voice inside me whispered, “Faith, not fear.” In moments of profound crisis, it’s essential to cling to the answers and assurances we’ve received in quieter, clearer times. We had unequivocally felt, deeply and persistently, that speaking at Time Out For Women was something we were meant to do. This conviction, born of prior spiritual promptings, became our anchor in the storm. We knew He was there; we had felt His presence and guidance before.
With heavy hearts and tears streaming down our faces, we sent my sister off with our now-sick toddler, whom we affectionately (and tearfully) nicknamed “Barfy,” and boarded our flight. Just before the plane took off, my sister called, her voice a calming balm: “The minute we pulled away from the airport, he fell fast asleep, and all is well. Go do what you’re supposed to do.” Her words were a profound comfort, a lifeline that allowed us to proceed with a glimmer of hope and renewed purpose.
Our Time Out For Women event was, by all accounts, pretty incredible, filled with inspiring connections and meaningful presentations. Yet, our hearts remained anxious, eager to return home and check in on everyone. True to our fears, our poor sister had been up all night, every night, with our child battling the flu. He was still not feeling well when we returned, but she had powered through it with remarkable strength and grace. It was quite an experience for her, a single woman without children of her own, offering her an unexpected, hands-on lesson in the intense realities and boundless love of motherhood.
When Prayers Seem Unanswered: Finding Blessings in the Opposite
I still don’t fully understand why things sometimes happen in direct opposition to our most earnest prayers. It’s almost as if you lay your deepest desires out there, and someone hears and decides, “Ah, this will be an excellent opportunity for them to practice having faith, to learn resilience.” Regardless of the specific ‘why,’ I’ve learned an invaluable lesson: there is always a blessing, always a miracle, that emerges from the act of moving forward, especially when faced with adversity that seems to defy logic or divine intervention.
Perhaps my sister needed to learn how to navigate incredibly challenging situations independently, discovering her own profound strength and capability.
Perhaps our children needed to learn the invaluable lessons of helping out, adapting, and surviving with greater independence when Mom and Dad aren’t around, fostering their own resilience.
For Cade and me, this experience was a powerful lesson in pressing forward with unwavering faith when we’ve been called to do something, even when the path ahead seems utterly impossible, fraught with emotional and logistical hurdles. Or perhaps, most simply, we just needed to be stretched, to go through something difficult that would ultimately strengthen our resolve and deepen our trust.
Ultimately, the exact reason for the turn of events doesn’t truly matter. I believe what matters most is the choice we make in those moments of apparent contradiction. It’s about choosing to say, “Even if my prayers aren’t answered in the way I wanted or thought I desperately needed, I still trust you, and I am holding on, so you can know you can trust me.” It’s a testament to a deeper, more enduring faith.
Discovering Inspiration at Time Out for Women
For those unfamiliar with our journey, we are thrilled to share more about Time Out for Women and Time Out for Girls. These events are an incredibly significant part of our lives, and we cherish the opportunity to contribute to them and witness their profound impact. While we’ve spoken about them before, we want to ensure everyone understands the transformative power they hold.
Time Out for Women is an enriching two-day event meticulously designed to bring women together from all walks of life. Its core mission is to provide an uplifting and inspiring environment where attendees can hear powerful messages from dynamic speakers and be moved by incredible musical artists. These conferences are held in various locations all over the world, making accessible an experience of renewal and spiritual growth. Tickets can be conveniently purchased through the official website, TOFW.
For countless women and their families, attending Time Out for Women has become a cherished annual tradition. They return year after year, finding themselves refreshed, renewed, and re-energized, ready to face life’s challenges with greater faith and perspective.
The speakers at Time Out For Women cover a diverse range of subjects, offering deep insights and practical tools for navigating modern life. Each presenter brings a unique and powerful message:
- Alisa Parker– Alisa shares her deeply moving journey of faith and forgiveness after the tragic loss of her 6-year-old daughter in the Sandy Hook shootings. Her message resonates with profound resilience and the power of moving forward with grace.
- Emily Watts– Emily is a beacon of joy and wit who candidly addresses the often-annoying truth that exercise can be a pathway to well-being. She helps attendees discover inspiring ways to uplift themselves and move through life with greater meaning and purpose.
- Carol J Decker– Carol’s incredible story details her survival of Sepsis during her second pregnancy, leading to multiple amputations and complete blindness. She courageously shares her journey of finding profound joy and meaning in a life she never expected to live, a true testament to the human spirit.
- Jenny Oaks Baker– A Grammy-nominated musician, Jenny Oaks Baker fills the entire conference hall with soul-stirring music. Her performances are not merely concerts; they are spiritual experiences that deeply touch and uplift every listener.
- Tim Ballard– Tim, a former CIA agent, founded Operation Underground Railroad (O.U.R.) after realizing the limitations preventing him from rescuing missing children sold into slavery. He now leads a global organization operating in 17 countries, dedicated to rescuing young children, some as young as toddlers, from the horrors of child sex slavery. His work is a call to action and a testament to profound courage.
- Cade and Carrian Cheney– That’s us! We speak about discovering and embracing the light even in the darkest of times. Our presentations also focus on how to consciously utilize social media as a powerful tool for good, rather than allowing it to become a distracting time-sink.
And many other inspiring individuals contribute to the rich tapestry of the Time Out For Women experience!
Empowering the Next Generation: Time Out For Girls
Time Out for Girls is a unique and specially tailored event designed exclusively for young women aged 12-18 years old. It’s truly remarkable to witness mothers and adult women being uplifted and inspired in one hall, while simultaneously, a vibrant group of daughters and young women experience similar empowerment and growth in another dedicated space.
You can easily find event schedules and locations on the TOFW page, ensuring young women everywhere have access to this incredible experience.
The speakers at Time Out For Girls are carefully chosen to resonate with and empower young women, addressing their unique challenges and potential:
- David Butler– One of our absolute favorite speakers, Dave inspires young girls to understand their inherent worth, connect with scriptures in a meaningful way, and realize their incredible potential to become something truly amazing.
- Elaine Dalton– Elaine served for many years as a global leader for young women, and now continues to inspire girls to remember their divine potential and to strive to live up to it with confidence and purpose.
- Kendal Levine– Kendal’s extraordinary story begins when she was serving a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and was hit by a car whose driver had fallen asleep, throwing her a significant distance. She suffered a traumatic brain injury that initially left her unable to walk, talk, or feed herself. Being told she might never regain these abilities must have been terrifying. Yet, Kendal chose defiance, proving the doctors wrong. She now shares her powerful journey of overcoming immense physical challenges and finding enduring happiness through profound resilience.
- Al Carraway– Al is a warm, bubbly soul, easily recognizable by her distinctive tattoos. She shares with young girls a compelling message about how the only true and lasting way to find genuine happiness is through discovering and faithfully following their Savior.
- Madilyn Paige– Madilyn gained national recognition as a contestant on “The Voice,” where she was mentored by industry giants Blake Shelton and Usher. Today, she uses her beautiful music to empower girls, inspiring them to embrace self-love, confidence, and their unique identity.