Our Enduring Love Story: 11 Years and Counting
Today marks a truly special milestone for us: we are celebrating 11 incredible years of marriage. Eleven years! The thought of it evokes a fascinating mix of emotions and reflections. On one hand, it genuinely feels like just yesterday we exchanged vows at the beautiful Portland Oregon temple, embarking on this shared adventure. The memories of that day – the anticipation, the joy, the profound commitment – remain vividly etched in my heart as if no time has passed at all. Yet, simultaneously, it feels like Cade and I have simply always been together, woven into the very fabric of each other’s lives. I honestly cannot fathom what life would be like without him by my side, navigating every triumph and challenge together.
I’ve often heard people remark on the inherent difficulty of marriage, a sentiment I’ve never quite resonated with. While popular culture and personal anecdotes frequently paint marriage as an arduous struggle, I firmly believe it’s not truly “hard” in the way some suggest. Rather, it demands dedication, consistent effort, profound humility, a spirit of selfless service, and a host of other crucial virtues. It requires a daily, conscious choice to nurture and uphold the bond you share. For me, it’s never felt hard to wake up each morning and consciously remind myself that the deep affection and unwavering commitment we felt for each other on our wedding day are still very much alive. We chose each other for deeply meaningful reasons, and those reasons continue to guide and strengthen our journey. So, with immense gratitude and joy, here is the unfolding tapestry of our story, a testament to enduring love and partnership.
Our paths first converged during our college years at BYU-Idaho, a time of self-discovery and burgeoning aspirations. The campus brimmed with energy, and among its vibrant community, Cade and I found ourselves sharing a unique professional space. Cade was deeply immersed in the world of fitness, serving as a personal trainer, an inspiring “Abs that Rock” instructor, and held a leadership role as a student athletic director. My own passion for health and wellness led me to become a personal trainer and a pilates instructor. Naturally, our shared interests and professional overlaps meant we were often around each other, fostering a strong and comfortable friendship for about a year before any romantic spark began to ignite. This period of genuine platonic connection laid a solid foundation, allowing us to truly get to know each other’s personalities, values, and humor without the pressures of dating.
Looking back, I playfully “blame” Cade for the delay in our romance, but in truth, a significant part of my hesitation stemmed from my own feelings. The sheer intensity of my emotions whenever I saw him was overwhelming, causing a nervousness I hadn’t anticipated. There was an instinctive, almost prophetic feeling that if I were to date him, that would be it – a profound, life-altering commitment. This realization, while thrilling, was also incredibly daunting. It felt like stepping onto a path with no return, a journey towards a destiny I wasn’t entirely sure I was ready for, even as my heart yearned for it. This blend of excitement and apprehension meant our relationship lingered in the friend zone a little longer than perhaps it needed to, each of us subconsciously processing the profound connection that was undeniably forming between us.
As summer approached, life took me on an unexpected detour. I packed my bags and moved first to Texas, then to Chicago, embracing new experiences and opportunities away from the Idaho campus. Following these adventures, I made the decision to transfer to BYU in Utah for my continued studies. It was there, just a couple of days before the new academic year was set to begin, that an extraordinary experience unfolded. One quiet evening, as I knelt in prayer, seeking guidance and clarity for my future, I felt an incredibly strong, undeniable impression that I needed to pack everything up and return to Idaho. The feeling was so profound and insistent that it left no room for doubt or questioning. It was a clear, divine whisper directing my path back to a place I had just left.
Acting on this powerful spiritual prompting, I swiftly arranged my move, securing an apartment in Idaho and registering for classes. In the whirlwind of relocation and academic preparation, Cade was genuinely not at the forefront of my mind. My focus was entirely on settling into my new (yet old) surroundings and getting ready for the semester ahead. It felt like a fresh start, guided by an intuition that transcended logic. This unexpected return, prompted by a deep sense of faith and trust, would soon unveil an incredible chapter that neither of us could have foreseen, setting the stage for destiny to truly intervene in the most remarkable way possible, bringing us back into each other’s orbits under circumstances that were nothing short of miraculous.
The first morning of classes arrived, and I found myself walking into my Anatomy and Physiology lecture, ready to immerse myself in the fascinating world of human biology. However, the classroom was unexpectedly packed. The professor, noticing the overflowing capacity, asked if anyone would be willing to switch to a different class time to help alleviate the congestion. Without much thought, I agreed, seeing it as a minor inconvenience rather than a significant event. Little did I know, this seemingly small decision was a pivotal moment orchestrated by fate itself. When I showed up for my newly assigned lab section later that day, my jaw nearly dropped. Guess who was assigned as my lab partner? None other than Cade! The universe, it seemed, had a very specific plan to bring us back together, defying all odds and geographical changes. It was an undeniable sign, a moment that felt destined, yet despite this incredible reunion, it still took a few more weeks for him to actually gather the courage to ask me out. The anticipation during those weeks was almost unbearable, a blend of excitement and impatience as our connection deepened through shared studies and quiet glances.
And when he finally did ask me out, well, that’s a story I’ve felt a touch of delightful guilt about ever since. The evening it happened, I was actually on a date with someone else. We were at his place, and he had just stepped into his room to grab his coat, preparing for us to leave. It was at this precise moment that Cade, completely unaware of my current company, walked into the living room to hang out with one of the other roommates. Our eyes met, and in that fleeting instant, he subtly signaled for me to call him later. Knowing Cade, and his generally humble nature, I honestly wasn’t sure if it was meant as a date invitation or just a casual call between friends. But the truth was, I liked him, and I liked him a lot. The thought of finally having a chance with Cade overshadowed everything else. So, with a racing heart and a resolve born of genuine attraction, I ended my current date early, offering a quick excuse, and did exactly what Cade’s subtle signal had suggested. That night, I called him, taking a leap of faith that would forever alter the course of my life.
That evening, following my somewhat abrupt departure from the other date, Cade and I spent our first official date watching a movie. It was simple, yet profoundly significant. From that night forward, our lives intertwined, and we’ve been together ever since. While I don’t necessarily subscribe to the idea that there’s only one “soulmate” out there for every single person in the vastness of the world, I do unequivocally believe that Cade was, and is, my person. He is the one meant for me, a conviction that has only deepened with every passing year and every shared experience. Our journey together has been a testament to this belief, solidifying his irreplaceable role in my life. Cade’s unwavering strength and profound compassion were never more evident than when he cared for me and our growing family through the debilitating and truly terrifying experience of scary hyperemesis gravidarum. This extreme form of morning sickness rendered me incredibly ill, making basic daily functions a monumental challenge. During that time, his steady hand, boundless patience, and sacrificial service were my anchors. He stepped up in every conceivable way, ensuring my comfort and the well-being of our children, embodying the truest definition of partnership and devotion. His presence and support during such a vulnerable period showcased the depth of his love and commitment, reaffirming a thousand times over that he is indeed the man I was meant to spend my life with, my steadfast companion through all of life’s unpredictable seasons.
After 11 years of navigating the beautiful complexities of marriage, we’ve come to understand some profound truths about what makes a partnership not just survive, but truly thrive. It’s a revelation that has reshaped our perspectives and deepened our bond immeasurably. We’ve learned that a lasting, fulfilling marriage isn’t primarily about grand romantic gestures, or even about meticulously identifying each other’s “love languages” as the sole key to happiness. While those elements certainly play a part in expressing affection, the true essence of enduring love goes far beyond them. It’s not about what each of us can *do* for the other in a transactional sense, nor is it about keeping score or maintaining perfect equilibrium at all times. Instead, it’s a much more spiritual and deeply personal commitment.
Our experience has taught us that marriage is fundamentally about waking up every single day with the conscious intention to be a little more true to your faith, to each other, and crucially, to yourself. It’s about the constant, sometimes challenging, yet always rewarding, effort of giving your absolute all to the relationship. This means continually offering forgiveness, not just for significant transgressions, but for the countless small missteps and imperfections that arise in daily life. It means proactively choosing to assume the best intentions in your partner – to “assume the good and doubt the bad” – rather than allowing negativity or misunderstanding to fester. And perhaps most importantly, it’s about shifting the focus away from oneself and genuinely prioritizing the other person’s well-being, happiness, and growth. This isn’t about self-sacrifice to the point of personal depletion, but rather about a profound, selfless love that seeks to uplift and support.
I loved Cade deeply from the moment our journey truly began, and that love has only grown and matured over these 11 years. A significant part of how I sustain and deepen this love is by actively choosing to see him in the best possible light, always. This involves consciously appreciating his strengths, acknowledging his efforts, and overlooking minor flaws, understanding that perfection is an illusion. It also means committing to never speak ill of him to others, no matter the circumstance or fleeting frustration. Protecting his character and our relationship’s sanctity in conversation is a cornerstone of our mutual respect. Furthermore, I consistently make an effort to remember that initial, intoxicating “long ago love” – the fresh wonder, the pure excitement, the unwavering belief in our connection. By recalling and cherishing those foundational feelings, I keep the flame alive, even as love transforms and deepens into something richer and more complex. That early love was profoundly real, and its truth continues to resonate powerfully within our marriage today. It serves as a constant reminder of the incredible foundation upon which we’ve built our beautiful life together, a life characterized by genuine partnership, unwavering support, and an ever-evolving, yet deeply rooted, love.
We absolutely cherish hearing about how other couples met and fell in love. Every love story is unique and inspiring, offering beautiful insights into the diverse tapestry of human connection. We encourage you to share your own journey with us – leave your story in the comments below! We’d be delighted to read it and celebrate the magic of connection with you.